A Couple & Sex Therapist's Take on Love Is Blind UK

As a Minnesota couples therapist who digs Love is Blind, I was intrigued to see how the UK version would compare to its US counterpart. One thing that struck me was the noticeable level of emotional intelligence displayed by many contestants in the UK show.

Emotional Intelligence: the Ingredients

One of the most refreshing aspects of Love Is Blind UK was the level of emotional maturity exhibited by many of the contestants. This contrasts with some other reality dating shows, where emotional intelligence can sometimes take a backseat to drama and conflict. Let's explore the key aspects of emotional intelligence that were prominently displayed throughout the show:

Open Communication & Assertiveness:

Many contestants were willing to discuss their feelings, fears, and expectations openly. They engaged in honest dialogues about their past relationships, insecurities, and hopes for the future. This openness laid the groundwork for deeper connections and mutual understanding. 
One time I really appreciated this was with Tom & Maria. They obviously had different views on gender roles in a marriage. I really appreciated how both made their values clear knowing the other didn’t agree. Tom got a lot of heat for this, but I appreciate his directness in letting Maria know that he wanted a partner with ambition in her career and didn’t want his partner to stay home with the kids. Maria had opposite values about this and was also very clear about it. Gender roles in a marriage are a very important thing to be on the same page with, so I admire the risk it took in them putting it out there. 

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Active Listening:

Numerous participants demonstrated excellent listening skills, showing genuine interest in their partners' thoughts and feelings. They asked thoughtful follow-up questions and provided empathetic responses, creating an environment where both parties felt heard and valued.

Emotional Regulation:

When faced with conflicts or disappointments, many contestants displayed admirable emotional regulation. Instead of reacting impulsively, they often took time to process their emotions and respond in a more measured way. This skill was particularly crucial given the high-pressure environment of the show. 
I saw Freddie regulating his emotions when it might’ve been easy to let them get out of control when in intense conversations with Cat. His ability to regulate is likely why he had little patience for her inability to do the same.
I will say that Ollie did not show the best emotional regulation skills when presented with the conflict with Jasmine. I did see him trying but his first instinct was to shut down and give up.

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Empathy:

Participants frequently demonstrated a keen ability to understand and share the feelings of their partners and the other contestants, offering support and compassion during challenging moments. This empathy fostered a supportive atmosphere even amidst the competition inherent in the show's format. Even though Jasmine went a little overboard at times, I think she really cared about the other women and did her best to support them during tough times.

Self-Awareness:

Numerous contestants showed a high degree of self-awareness, openly acknowledging their flaws and areas for growth. Demi, in particular, impressed me with her journey of self-reflection and personal growth, even under the intense scrutiny of reality TV.

Implications for Relationships

The emotional intelligence displayed in Love Is Blind UK shows me that at least some of these contestants will continue to do well in having hard conversations in relationships, navigating conflict, and fostering deep connections. And some will likely continue to struggle with these things until they do some inner work to figure out why this happens. 

Let’s be real – this is still reality TV and we all need to take what we see with a grain of realism.  I was, however, impressed with this season’s cast and look forward to see more seasons set in the UK.
The show serves as a reminder of the importance of emotional intelligence in forming and maintaining healthy relationships. It also highlights the ongoing progress in breaking down barriers to emotional expression and fostering more authentic connections.

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Consider talking to a couples therapist or online therapist

As we continue to value and cultivate emotional intelligence in our society, we may see more examples of these skills across various platforms and in everyday life. This can only lead to healthier, more fulfilling relationships - both on and off the screen.
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Read about my thoughts on cheating (based on Love is Blind 2024), or other seasons of Love is Blind here, or read more about couples therapy and marriage counseling hot topics on our therapy blog. (Not sure what ENM means? Do you need a sex room? (spoiler alert: YES, you do need a sex room!) Thinking about opening your relationship? Interested in knowing more about self-love and pleasure?) Of course, if you're anywhere in Minnesota and want to connect, we would love to talk with you about relationships, sexual concerns, trauma and PTSD, and more. 

1. Contact the Sexual Wellness Institute to set up your first appointment.
2. Meet with one of our skilled sex therapists for an intake appointment.
3. Begin building better communication with your partner, overcome sexual concerns and experience new fun and intimacy in your relationship!​

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